Thanks guys, for bringing this thread back to what it was intended for. I deleted a couple of my off topic posts, sorry for the tangent. :-[
I didn’t even notice. No problemo! 
I do ask everyone at rewild.info to not use obviously charged words and languaging.
Regardless of what you consider reasonable, we have a very impersonal forum here, and even non-charged words can go awry. I don’t ascribe this dynamic to low self-esteem on anyone’s part, but rather to the straightforward ease of miscommunication when we have only letters on a page and emoticons to go off of.
Unless the context justifies it, using charged language, such as the ‘n-word’, or the ‘p-word’, will bring me out of my hole and into the middle of your thread to put my foot down.
Some things feel like a slap in the face to a large enough group of people that it just doesn’t recommend their use.
Does this put us down a politically correct track? Who cares? What do we need to do to keep this a safe and welcoming space to talk about rewilding? Doesn’t this matter most?
I don’t want to know what ‘makes the most sense’, or sounds the ‘most reasonable’, in terms of posting guidelines, I want to know what we actually need to do to encourage satisfying and powerful conversation. This means, what do the people, the foolish, stubborn, optimistic, pessimistic, thin-skinned, thick-skinned, undernourished, overfed, gun-shy, neurotic, phobic people that we call rewilders, what do THEY need.
Obviously, they (meaning WE) do not need reasonable things.
I have a pretty clear sense for myself about this, but I always stay open for new ideas. In the meanwhile, unless moderators (like myself) adjust them, please use your common sense and the guidelines I’ve encouraged to keep this place vital and healthy.
I haven’t noticed this (recently). Can you give me some examples? Did someone do this to you?
Hey heyvictor,
I agree with you, and I have an offering for you. I think the parsing and quoting of language is a tendency to break up what people say. As I indicated above, I have been purposefully alienated with that language (or should I say typing?) tool, especially when I was being targeted and having my swiss-cheese intellect parsed into sentences and paragraphs. On the other hand, it’s overwhelming to get a ‘sense’ of what someone is saying when they are hitting on multiple topics, and the parsing and quoting seems helpful.
What you can’t do in face to face conversations is literally throw someone’s words back at them, unless you have a great memory. Most face-to-face conversations respond to each other emotionally. What I think is funny, is that by the time we get a handle on each other, this medium will be obsolete, well, I’ve been working on it for 12 years, and I think perhaps video messaging will be more commonplace than people understanding what we mean when it comes to the written word.
Without giving someone your emotional input, 90 percent of the conversation is lost.
also, to everyone, I dont’ think it’s a good idea to delete a post. you can’t take back words, and so, if we choose to be scientists, linking back and forth, and making presentations, then there will be nothing worth deleting, because every ‘share’ is a lesson.
and if we wish to muddle through and attempt to have personal conversations, then it’s good to offend, and apologize, rather than redact. You get more out of the apology, than out of the erasure, as I’ve experienced.
not saying these are our only choices, but they do seem to be landmarks on the conversation spectrum.
but in the personal, we can communicate a lot, and in the demonstrative (‘scientific’) we can also be playful. It real does take skill to make it happen, to show people who you are online.
Is it a futile journey? I’d hope not. I’ve seen a lot of improvement. And we’re all getting things out of that ten percent now.
I would like to see people be more demonstrative in their communication, if even to demonstrate their personality, through giving us a glimpse at their process. Who is going to demonstrate offensive language? Crude Humor? Their own ass? well, maybe we’ll get a peek up a loin cloth or two
Oops. Sorry, I was mixing up the settings of your stories.
In my defense (or rather, in defense of what I said about Midwest compared w/ West), I do think that an Eastern U.S. city (I’ve been to Philly, Boston (lived there a summer), New York, and lived in Charlottesville, VA [dubiously Eastern]) is more similar to a Midwestern city than a Midwestern city is like a West coast city.
In the U.S., the West coast is a whole different animal, IMO (though admittedly I have never been to the deep South, or the desert states, so I can’t speak with as high a degree of confidence as I’d like). I lived near San Diego for a summer and got the same vibe that I do from Seattle. It is very confusing to me because I always had the idea growing up that I’d fit in better on the West coast, but it seems that everything that there is (was?) to love about the Hippie Promised Land has been abandoned. Either that, or SO many people have moved to the West coast that the culture has been diluted.
Either way, I’ve never been to San Francisco and I never plan to! My idea of San Francisco is a beautiful idea that I don’t want to have squashed by good old-fashioned, can’t-argue-with, empirical expereience.
But anyway, none of that has to do with the topic at hand…
so, carry on… I’ll shut up. :-X 
The South is more like the midwest ( the “corn/hog/whiskey/bible belt” stretches from South Carolina to Iowa). Hard core left winger east coasters have a hard time fitting in in the left coast because their “what do you do? Where did you go to school” shallowness does not fit in with the “who is your plastic surgeon/life coach” shallowness of SoCal or the “I don’t care what you think” "been their done that "Northwest attitude.I’m from SC spent too much time in Vermont , lived 3 years in Beautiful Glenwood Springs Colorado. Been to Pagan festival in NM. Spent summer picking Morrells in eastern Oregon. Seen Survival Research Laboratory show in Seattle then long sunny day in Portland followed by searching for spot to park VW van in Eugene. The 3 years in SF… Never Mind
[quote=“Neighbor Scout, post:22, topic:487”][quote author=TonyZ link=topic=523.msg5797#msg5797 date=1194400391]
Neighbor Scout.
Besides, how will some of my friends react if I suddenly started to say ‘n-word, please?’ Oh wait, we do say that once and a while, but it’s ironic. Culturally, nigger (and vocalizing ‘nigger’ is much more worse than my actual use ‘nigga’) is more appropriate for me and some of my friends. Of course I have white friends who are shocked to hear a teacher say it in the ‘meta’ context, and they don’t know my other friends.
I actually do see why pussy, when used derogatorily, sucks way worse than nigger. It’s harder to justify, whereas the female community has embraced bitchy and even cunty, pussy is usually a sexy word, not a mean one.
I guess the only thing I’ll really be able to expose here is how snide and cynical me and my friends are, and how at 27, the only people I care to not offend are the people I want to be my friends. But really, I don’t care if I offend my friends. If offense were a game, it would be our national pastime. Maybe that makes us twisted. I think it keeps us sane.
It would be different if I balked at whitey or cracker, but I have a few t-shirts with those very words. Somehow organically, we grew into the angry labels, and transformed them. I don’t think I’m going to get anywhere else to organically bring these points home to people who weren’t there when it happened.
[/quote][/quote]
Now ??? Or did you already answer my question, Tonyz? Sorry, sometimes I have brainfarts and miss things.
yeah go ahead, I thought it was rhetorical. sorry for the delay, I was out hiding.
Just a thought here. Not coming down on anyone. But maybe something that has not been considered.
I’ve been on a few forums that had a good number of people from outside N. America for whom English is not their first language. Some of them have expressed difficulty in understanding posts where people choose to use their own way of spelling words.
This forum seems to be pretty much N. Americans and/or fluent English speakers. Using a lot of alternative spellings of words or just being in a hurry, as well as leaving out punctuation, may contribute to keeping it that way.
I’m not always a shining example.
I guess you didn’t make it rhetorical enough for me, 'cause I didn’t see it like that.
Anyway, to answer your quetion in the way before I learned of its impressive agenda: I donno; I donno your friends. Also, have you noticed this that ‘please!?’ works just as well as ‘n-word, please!?’ nowadays (or, at least, I guess it does) if used with the same tone? And in that, did you notice how the ere lacks labeling and the later supports outright labeling? For instance, in my opinion, the added label in “n-word, please!?†spits quite superfluously, crassy, confrontational, and challenging. Do we really want to spend additional calories on such superfluousness and spittle-spattle when we when have so much more tangible and pressing stuff to fail or fulfill? Hmmm…whatda you think?
Anybody? :-\
Perhaps you and/or they can speak up and give examples of what they have difficulty in understanding, otherwise, personally, I don’t know where to began.
Again, if you or them provide zero examples then, what do we supposed to work off here? Do you have something? Who did they see doing this here? What did they see? Can you show use how they came to such conclusions?
And, earlier in another post you claimed:
Will you share any examples of where you saw this, ‘cause lately this statement of yours hasn’t come to my attention around the forum. And I must add that I fear being redundant to a degree here because I noticed that another has asked ya a similar question? Perhaps, you answered him in a personal message, I donno, IDK, I just want to avoid reading as much examplelessness as possible.
I don’t always choose to express things in the best way myself, and Neighbor Scout I think you have pointed out an example of me doing that here.
I did reply to Willem in a personal message.
I have no desire to single anyone out and start anything, but in general I think the things I was talking about in both of these posts are just something to be aware of in posting on a forum. Maybe others don’t agree.
my inefficiencies have multiple flourishes
ha ha ha, I love this, so do mine, nothing to boast about though
[quote=“Neighbor Scout, post:37, topic:487”][quote author=TonyZ link=topic=523.msg6303#msg6303 date=1196044020]
yeah go ahead, I thought it was rhetorical. sorry for the delay, I was out hiding.
[/quote]
I guess you didn’t make it rhetorical enough for me, 'cause I didn’t see it like that.
Anyway, to answer your quetion in the way before I learned of its impressive agenda: I donno; I donno your friends. Also, have you noticed this that ‘please!?’ works just as well as ‘n-word, please!?’ nowadays (or, at least, I guess it does) if used with the same tone? And in that, did you notice how the ere lacks labeling and the later supports outright labeling? For instance, in my opinion, the added label in “n-word, please!?” spits quite superfluously, crassy, confrontational, and challenging. Do we really want to spend additional calories on such superfluousness and spittle-spattle when we when have so much more tangible and pressing stuff to fail or fulfill? Hmmm…whatda you think?
Anybody? :-[/quote]
Ah yes, very good point in my opinion.
I do admit that being crass, confrontational, and challenging can be a very simple way to get a basic judgement of character by watching somebodies response to it. It is very dividing though, and when I personally do it, often it comes from a place of frustration and cynicism.
sometimes i use the crass/rude card purely to shock everyone involved out of a disagreement in a rut.
i’ve seen it help people take a second look at the issue at hand from the other point of view. doesn’t always work tho’, so i use it situationally.
Word.
I agree. I understand useful crassly/a-holey enactments work to ‘gain trusts, cooperation, friends, and community’ sometimes (rarely I’d imagine), but when used superfluously just to try mess with participants senses, time, focus, and practice unhelpfully/unsolicitedly/degeneratively/know-it-all-ly, why bother?
Think (give myself some open-minded growing space) before (or, in fact, ‘all the time’) I act sort of comes to mind.