Has anyone ever noticed that a girl that can spend days in the woods without a complaint is a lot more sexy than those girls who sees a bug and screams? Maybe it’s just me, but I find girls who are all prissy and “girly” almost disgusting. Maybe it’s just me wanting to find a girl that shares my passion. Idk, what are ya’lls thoughts?
It’s just the most practical way of selecting a mate, and you just happen to like the woods and bugs, so any woman who doesn’t would never suit you past the first bang anyway. Unfortunately, a lot of people aren’t that selective about what they think is sexy, and other less practical instincts take over-- like the instinct to protect and control another person, change them, somehow, which might make the bug screamers more attractive to a man than someone who is perfectly competent, but less of a challenge to protect. Marriage is about sharing most things in common, being able to be friends with similar attitudes toward life, because after the first hurrah and rush of sexual attraction, that’s all that is left. I’m a very old lady, and I know this for a fact. The original turn on fades rather quickly, but if you allow it to, something even better takes its place, and if each partner can resist other “more exciting” love adventures enough (and they do come along, especially at mid life,) a life partner can be a good thing. All you need is having most attitudes in common, honesty in conversations, and above all, respect for each other where views may differ, and even with the most perfect matches, they will indeed differ.
We live in a society full of “celebrities” of the macho type “ideal” in men and the snakey, self-centered, show off women, and the big boob, no brains fashions in celebrity women, who are supposed to be the objects of all men’s desire. They are pushed in our faces on a daily basis, as if the rest of us should all want one, and be just like them. Most of them are very talented, successful people of some sort, make a lot of money, etc., but their personal lives are not to be envied, and most of them have become egotistical assholes no one should try to emulate in real life. This sort of romance image is Bull Shit. Go for the possibly more homely lady who can pick up a snake and kiss it before releasing it again-- and a gal you can laugh with about the same things.
the instinct to protect and control another person
Wanting to control someone isn’t an instinct, it’s a psychopathology.
[quote author=incendiary_dan link=topic=1034.msg11589#msg11589 date=1217650832]
Wanting to control someone isn't an instinct, it's a psychopathology.
If this is true, which I’m not saying it isn’t, it seems to be an extremely predominant and wide-spread psychopathology born out by the history of governments and most organized religions, in which “God” is the ultimate controlling psychopath, as well as what is often recognized in many societies as the “ideal” family unit. This is getting somewhat off the topic of mate choices, however.
Patty
Yep, psychopathology is all around us. (It sickens me to witness its sheer magnitude. I try to remain aware of it so I don’t get sucked into the culture… but damn it makes it hard to keep a job in customer service.)
A while back, I started a thread called “Psychology”. If you wanna continue this discussion over there, I (for one) would be happy to join you as this is a neverending topic of interest for me.
I’ve been admired for not shrieking at the usual creepy critter, but when it comes to a woman with hairy legs and pits, greasy hair, no makeup, etc., rare is the person who is willing to make the leap to find that attractive, even among the alternative crowd. Very frustrating.
@Mamalove: I find all those things quite attractive! Truly, though, that sentiment is rare and the women who do it are rarer.
Mamalove, honestly the logic behind shaving/waxing is beyond me. It’s just something people are conditioned into and never question. I find my hairy legs/pits as an instant asshole repellent actually.
I’m going to have to disagree on the pit shaving. Well, I guess it makes less sense for women. For me, as a man, it’s actually really beneficial. I smell less. It’s just easier hygiene maintenance.
But whenever we get into this conversation, I always feel the need to point out that removal of body hair isn’t a specifically civilized thing. Many, in fact most (that I know of) indigenous cultures practice some form of body hair removal. In this area, many peoples regularly plucked all their body hair. Some times head hair, too.
;D That’s awesome! When I lived in hippie towns on the West Coast I didn’t shave for 15 years. I figured, if you can’t deal with my hair, there’s gonna be a whole crap-ton of stuff about me you won’t be able to handle either!
Then I moved to the South, which I love, but I felt like the discrimination factor went up ten-fold, and my kids were getting old enough to be embarrassed… etc. No good excuses, just pathetic reasons.
I’m gonna have to agree with incendiary dan about smell… there are times in the summer that I shave my pits just because I feel more comfortable/less sweaty. I think personal preference is a perfectly good reason! Just shaving/waxing purely for other people feels weak to me and I hate that I’ve caved. It seems to me to epitomize the worst part of civilization - feeling forced to do something one hates in order to avoid the consequences of non-conformity.
Yeah, nothing wrong with shaving for comfort, or to reduce friction when swimming. It’s just like cutting your hair short, long hair can be troublesome.
I know it’s not a specifically civilized thing, but really, plucking out all your body hair… :o was that like a religious thing or what?
MamaLove, the discrimination thing can get to you, but they are simpletons. I like this hair. It looks sparkly in the sun and feels cool in the wind.
Thinking about it, I’ve never had anyone react badly, sometimes evil looks, but mostly they just get embarrassed about it. Yes, they get embarrassed. My friend stopped shaving after I did, but her mum never ever stops bugging her about it. The problem isn’t really shaving itself, but the fact that it’s compulsory. And that people think it’s gross.
I haven’t found myself stinking significantly more without shaving, but whatever floats your boat. And float my boat I will, for no simpleton shall stop me.
:
Regarding the smell issue, I wonder if it’s a coincidence that deodorant became popular around the same time as synthetic fabrics. I’ve noticed that body odor smells worse on those types of fabrics.
feet also smell better when they dont have anything around
I can think of many other reasons for reducing the hair amount than beauty social conceptions, higiene or religious stuff …
if you want to feel the skin of somebody (kissing for example), you can only do it where there is no hair. wonder why dogs (is just what i see daily) lick each other mostly in the mouth, asshole or genitals.
In the terms of warfare, security or whatever it could be called… keeping short hair is can make the risk chances much smaller (please forigive my bad english). For example you will never see a grappler with hair long enough to be grabbed. Or a soldier with a long beard, as gas masks are useless if they can not adjust to the skin. Anybody ever tried to practice some BJJ with beard?
According to the Roman historian Tacitus, young warriors among the germanic tribe of the Catti (or Chatti?) could not cut their hair until they had slain an enemy. This practice was said to have spread to other tribes nearby.
Its funny how the tolerance of men to do whatever with body hair is countered with women needing to get rid of it all, like yesterday.
If you’ve never been shamed or stared down by another woman because of your body hair - it sucks, it comes especially from people who dont care how many razors you put in a landfill or if nair ends up in drinking water. The acceptable discomfort with the female body has such a weird but consistent history, there actual books on the subject.
https://www.amazon.com/Bearded-Lady-Kindle-Single-Altman-ebook/dp/B007II00XE#navbar
(I’m in the USA idk whats ok & whats not everywhere in the world)
i find that very attractive, personally.
If every hair works as an antenna, could it be that removing them reduces the stress from information overload?
Oh, and I feel really happy with so many tick alerts.