Tracie, that’s precisely why I made the conclusion as to why rewilding was impossible. I know no rewilders in person, just read their stories and listened to their conversations virtually. My entire Family is committed to civilization and enjoys it. My entire social community refuses to live in any way except Civilization, and all my inter-relationships are within it. And having autism, you have few means to learn primitive skills. I’ve never even held down a job that enabled me to earn enough money to support myself, and have been living off the inheritance from a wealthy ancestor. I’ve been able to earn enough money to travel anywhere to learn those skills, and soon will be forced to get Disability from the US government just to support myself.
thank you for elaborating James,
it makes me sad that rewilding = money to access “it” in so many cases - either literally, or perception wise. i wonder if anyone here on the forum and / or in the facebook group could help you locate others in your area who are not “in it” for profit? there are some amazing people who are happy to share their knowledge and build community. have you tried posting something with your general location already? warm regards 
Peter has asked, “Anyone out there want to tell their story?” and although I have been mentioning “snippets” of it in several posts in different posts on this blog, I am glad that this topic was mentioned, since I have a disability (autism) and, although I have mentioned earlier that I personally perceive rewilding to be an impossible thing for me to do because of my autism, but have not had enough time to describe “why” that is.
I have deleted the previous post now that I have written more of an extent of the story about my struggle. And Peter, I do not think of you and Rewilders as ableist. I think what’s really happening is that many people with disabilities have realized that Rewilding is impossible and they are helpless without civilization, and feel frustrated that this “reality” is not being sufficiently acknowledged on Rewilding forums. Sure, many disabilities are the product of civilization, but that doesn’t deny that they are still out there. This post is not an accusation of ableism, just an exploration into the subject.
Due to a heavy work schedule, as well as battling a series of medical health issues, I was not able to write about this immediately, but now have been able to free myself in order to write this piece. I will warn you–I am going to share some things that are probably going to make some people uncomfortable on this forum. I am hoping just to share to others some of the harsh realities that I have dealt with in my life as a consequence of being exposed to the anti-civilization and anarcho-primitivist movements as a person with a disability.
For many people with disabilities, the collapse of civilization will be a death sentence for them, as it will be for myself, and this isn’t because they want to destroy the Earth, it’s because they don’t have a choice. Most people I know with disabilities care about the Earth and resent the mass extinction crisis, but are completely dependent on the system causing those extinctions for their survival. Here’s my example: I suffer from many chronic health issues–acid reflux, digestive impairments that have resulted in chronic malnourishment, constant spells of chills that cause me to be periodically bedridden, diarrhea, chronic gas, and chronic colds. I rely on civilization for countless medications for my health, and had it not have been for modern medicine, my parents have told me, I would have died due to a series of adenoid enlargements at the age of seven that were gradually causing me to slowly suffocate to death, and I had to have advanced surgery to stay alive. I also was a late talker, and learned language through the written word, and would not have been able to communicate without the written language of civilization.
People can oppose civilization all they want, and obviously, I don’t believe my life is worth the mass extinctions caused by civilization, but I personally don’t agree with the idea that people who have to stay within civilization due to their limitations should be blamed for it.
I first was exposed to the anarcho-primitivist movement 13 years ago, in 2003, when I was a teenager battling with a deep depression. It was via a now defunct website called Earth Crash Earth Spirit, by Oneida Kincaid. She had created a website and blog comprising news about the collapse of the Earth, along with essays that are read commonly among the anti-civ and anarcho-primitivist movements. This linked me to the Peak Oil movement, and I eventually found about the Tribe of Anthropik, in 2005, via Ran Prieur’s website, which taught me about the College of Mythic Cartography and Reading what everyone was saying made me very mentally and physically ill and caused my life to deteriorate around me. I so wanted to prove everybody wrong, and got to a point where I tried to argue on forums and websites whenever I could. I realize now why that was–when I realized that the collapse of civilization was inevitable, I realized that I could not survive, and wanted to challenge anyone who wrote about it. I did so because I thought I was fighting for my survival, and the survival of my community.
My entire survival has always depended on civilization from a young age, even though, ironically, my autism has made it very difficult for me to function within it. I’d said this before but I feel so sorry for all the people I upset and hurt in my attempt to disprove them. It was childish and delusional for me to think I could just barge people’s forums and disprove ideas that they had worked hard to prove and research, and to think I could change the minds of other people’s observations. Willem has helped me extensively understand the error of my ways. In reality, my Observations personally are so vastly different from so many of the Rewilders here, and like many civilized people, I was equating them with finding how “the way things are,” like a scientist. Willem’s mindset has helped me coexist and learn more about Rewilding paradigms, since I can still learn about the observations of others even if they differ so much from my own.
In contrast with so many people I have heard on this forum and others who have found community and a “sense of place” with rewilding, my autism has resulted in the opposite effect for me. The idea of rewilding has caused me to develop extreme psychological and physical, and each time I come back to it, it leads me to develop a mental breakdown that often disables me, forces me to withdraw from the forum, and then I return after my mental state has been restored. And then, I return, and I break down again. What keeps me back here? To learn about the perspective shared here, and explore the ways that humans can survive the coming crash even if I cannot. I’ve always been a lifelong learner, and even though I don’t share all of the beliefs posted here, I still can learn about them, understand them, and support the people who are working to survive the crash. I salute all of you and your efforts, even if I cannot be a part of them.
As a teenager, I so desperately wanted to disprove many rewilders, believing it was fight for survival. Paradoxically, my autism has made living in civilization very difficult, mind you–I have never been able to hold down a steady job, live independently, and to his day friendships I have built that appear to be stable end up falling apart without me even knowing what I am doing wrong.
From the perspective of a person with a hidden disability, I must say–anyone who is able to even join a rewilding community, and work on primitive skills–you are lucky, in my eyes. I hear so much talked about regarding the “victims” of civilization, but one thing I rarely see mentioned here is the fact that most of those “victims” are helpless to do much to rewild or abandon civilization. I was born in New York City, in the heart of civilization, and moved to the suburbs of Chicago when I was three years old. I have never been able to find my own place, or even hold down a steady job, and have never been fully independent of my family. I don’t live near Portland or Pittsburgh, two places with Rewilding groups, and there are no local “tribes” I have met in my community.
One of the things I think is important to remember is that the same “privilege” and “elite class system” that civilization has created has also created a system that determines, in many ways, who has the means to rewild and attempt to survive the upcoming collapse. Most people I know with disabilities are completely dependent on either government benefits, or their families, who themselves are entrenched in civilization. They have no means to attend rewilding sessions or wilderness areas. For example, I do not own a car and have never learned to drive one, and most wilderness areas are only accessible by car. The public transportation I rely on, for the most part, only services areas of civilization, e.g. mid-sized towns and cities. This has resulted in me, for the most part, not being able to access any wilderness in which to possibly hunt and gather.
At the same time, I have only had exposure to these movements via computer screens. I have never met a rewilder in person. My entire community, as I have said before, exists of civilized, domesticated individuals, with the exception of the Native Americans that I have social connections with as a part of my advocacy as a person with autism. Just north of the Chicago metropolitan area, where I live, is the state of Wisconsin, a state with multiple Native American reservations (and where most of the Native Americans in the Midwest were forcibly settled historically).
This dissonance has made things difficult for me in my life. I go “online” in the virtual world and see extensive, vast networks of rewilders, and rewilding discussions like on this Forum, and hear of a world where human beings are domesticated, and secretly hate civilization, and how hunter-gatherers lived better lives. Then I go “offline” into the world I live in–and everyone extols the virtues of civilization and enjoys it, and experiences very good lives within civilization, such as my Family, who opposes and despises Rewilders. What frustrates me now is that I can read the writings and discussions of Rewilders extensively, who tell me how I need to live in order to survive the coming crash, yet I have no actual social connections with Rewilders apart from the Internet. I don’t know any humans in person that believe or share any of the beliefs of the people on this forum, and I live within an entire extended family that enjoys Civilization. It frustrates me that so many people in the rewilding community insist that everyone has to feel miserable in Civilization, yet I personally know many people that enjoy Civilization, even when their health has become impaired and they have little leisure time as a result.
This is why, as I have said before, Rewilding is impossible for me. It would require me to abandon virtually everything that is a part of my life that I enjoy, my entire extended family, and my entire social network. Spending time on these forums, in fact, have strained my relationships with so many of my friends. Like so many people have mentioned here, Family and the “Tribe” are very important to Rewilding. I can’t Rewild without my Family, and I don’t really want to leave the community I grew up in and I am a part of, and values and accepts me for who I am. No human can survive on their own. I need to stay with my community, and work with them when the collapse occurs, whether or not it involves Rewilding. Therefore, I am not fighting for survival anymore. I accept the inevitability of civilization’s collapse, yet I know that, under no circumstances would I ever be able to survive.
By freeing myself from fighting to survive, I have been able to re-read so much with a different set of eyes–an eyes that gets to learn the true meaning behind what people are saying here. And I do hope to travel to Portland or other places and meet Rewilders in person, or find people locally in my hometown, apart from the Native American tribes I enjoy spending time with.
When you have autism, you have no true innate “sense of self”–because your observations of the world rarely equate to how the world actually is. I live in a bubble where my autistic “lens” causes me to observe the world in a way that very few others do, even other people with autism. I read all of the ways that Rewilders see the world, civilization, and there are so vastly different than how I perceive the world. Willem, I admire you for discussing, via the College of Mythic Cartography, your points on the Observational mode, since my Observations are so vastly different from most people that I have had to rely on the Observations of other people in the world. For example, extensive literature has been written about the mass extinction caused by civilization, but I have never actually observed any extinctions in my life. Yet I have been convinced by the Observations of others that it is indeed happening.
Finally, I also have concluded that there is a silver lining to my inability to survive. I have come to accept after hearing a lot of the evidence presented that the Earth can only support a human population of Rewilders in the millions, which necessitates at least the death of 6 billion people in order to achieve the harmony and balance enjoyed by the wild cultures mentioned here. Yet, for obvious reasons, most people I hear discuss this try to survive the die-off, and few, for obvious reasons, volunteer to be part of the 6 billion who must die.
Well, I have agreed to volunteer to be part of that 6 billion, not just because of my helplessness, but because I believe that I can still contribute to the cause by Dying in the collapse so that the people who can Rewild will be able to live. And in making that choice, reading about Rewilding no longer causes the same emotional impact it did before. And maybe, after Death, I will be reincarnated into the spirit of a wild plant or animal saved by the efforts of Rewilders. Of course, in the end, we will all die, and we have no control over what the future generations of Rewilders will accomplish.
Thanks for listening. Sorry for writing such an extensive thing, but I felt that it was important to share my story. Peter, THANK YOU for bringing up this important topic! And Willem–thank you for helping me cope with many of my struggles.
Thank you for sharing your story and your thoughts James 
Tracie_Moon, you are welcome. And thank you, Urban_Scout, for at least acknowledging these limitations. When I first heard about you and your book “Rewild or Die,” I have to admit, it seemed like a form of “ableism,” because if people really all have to either rewild or die, then I, along with a lot of people will disabilities, will certainly die. And messages like that caused me to behave in horrific ways to so many Rewilders.
But things have changed. By acknowledging my imminent, inevitable death at the hands of collapse, I no longer can accuse anyone of any discrimination. And I thank you for acknowledging that the people that are indeed, as you said, alive due to modern medicine are not bad people. The truth is, many people don’t have the option of rewilding. But then, many domesticated animals don’t ever have a chance of returning back to the wild either. That doesn’t make them bad animals (since humans are also animals as well). Heck, we have all written here about the victims of civilization, and probably the worst victimization that civilization has brought is that many of its own victims are unable to, due to lack of money and other means, escape from the “prison.”
My inspiration for Rewild or Die wasn’t “if you don’t rewild you will die,” it was, “I will rewild, or I will die trying.” There is no other option for me. There is absolutely an amount of ableism in that idea. Modern civilization has made a world some people cannot survive without it. It’s a very strange predicament. Many of my friends must take medications or they will die. Yet, some of them still have taken up the rewilding concept, and are working on it to the fullest extent that they can, within the limitations of their disabilities.
Peter,
Thank you for this clarification! I misunderstood your inspiration and I deeply apologize for this misunderstanding. Hmm…maybe I need to look into some of my other mistakes as well. Thanks.
James
There is an arrangement as a tribal community called for with moving to live separately from civilization. I would only like such a one where the people in it have care for one another, and those coming to them in need. The natural and wilder way of living does not have to be such where some should be excluded, such as according to what their abilities are, where there is caring for survival as a community, and it can be low impact in the world, not with greater impact on natural systems in this world that there in fact is from people generally that this should be separate from. I also think civilization in a way owes us, for all that it had us forget, to separate us from our natural living in this world, and we would be right to take advantage of access to medications useful to some of us, at least until the natural remedies that are accessible naturally for such things that those wanting the medications suffer are learned.
Frankprimalrivers,
I think that is important. Remember, too, that not all small groups necessarily are accepting. As a person with autism, I was horribly bullied in small groups while in school and elsewhere.
However, one thing that often causes me to feel disturbed by many proponents of tribalism and Rewilding is their insistence that they have to impose tribalism to everyone else. Granted, the people here on the forum do express a desire to Rewild, but I’ve always been a believer in diversity. I know many people who would despise Rewilding as well.
One thing I have always felt is that one of the biggest flaws in Civilization is it’s insistence that their way is the way everyone should live. Civilization used this mindset to displace a lot of tribal cultures, a tragic reality of our history. Yet to me, even with the arguments that tribalism is the way humanity is the most “evolved” to live, imposing tribalism and rewilding on all of humanity and telling everyone how to live seems just as wrong, and locked into the same “civilized” mindset that we are trying to fight against.
Probably the biggest tragedy is just how much many people would have to sacrifice things that are important to Rewilding in order to pursue the hunter-gatherer, neo-tribal future. I agree with many others here on how important Family and Community is to Rewilding. Yet, as I’ve said before, my entire family is tied to civilization, and so is my social community. And my autism has made it difficult for me to live independently–in fact, despite being in my late 20s, I’m still legally living with my parents and my family within civilization, which limited abilities to go out on my own.
Rather than repeating myself again, I’ve concluded that I would rather stay with my family and community within civilization (who will never be convinced to leave or abandon it), than go off and find a community or tribe with people I have only heard of via the Internet or people I have never met, and separate from the people who are there for me in person. Sadly, civilization has put me in this position, but I personally don’t think that in any hunter-gatherer society, a person would value the idea of leaving their community to go elsewhere. As people have noted on the forum, not all of rewilding consists of connecting with a “more-than-human” world, rather, rewilding also involves building tribes and family networks within your family. And I shall go down with my family and the community I belong to.
And I also will try to implement some of the brilliance I see here regarding rewilding. I may have initially tried to fight and challenge the notions, as Dickens, for example, regarding the verb “to be,” but that was because I was only 18 back then and didn’t really understand what was being said. In retrospect–I actually agree with the spirit of “E-Prime,” even though I often find it hard to say everything without the verb “to be,” due to the limitations of English. I always hated people using “god-like” statements in their work, and ironically, it was the same “god-like” attitude I sensed due to the verb “to be” that caused me to defend that very verb, not realizing what I was actually doing! It’s amazing how a little time and maturity can cause you to become so much more respectful and aware of others.
Again, those are just my thoughts. I wish everyone the best here in their efforts to rewild.
Rewilding and staying in civilisation do not have to be contrary at all, I think, not just learning about plants and animals, or any craft without modern equipment, but certainly also many social skills, like peacemaking. Even if you will never find yourself in a position to practice these skills in a tribal context, doing what you can and passing them on to others will benefit many people at some point in future.
I do not know the names of all the people that made up the lineage through which I learned the bow drill (or any other skill, for that matter). But I feel grateful to all of them. There may even have been moments in time that if they hadn’t passed them on, I would never have learned that skill at all.
So, who knows, you may form a key link in that chain for someone in the future…
Thank you James, for sharing your story. And I want to echo what others have said here, that rewilding does not need to be (and in fact can’t really be for us moderns) an all or nothing situation. Little steps can count for a lot, and for me, doing anything at all in the direction of rewilding gives me a huge peace of mind. Even if those small steps would seem to count for nothing in the big picture…it is very much like the Starfish Story I think.
I wonder if it might be helpful to you at all, to back off a little from the word “rewilding”. It sounds like it has become a bit of a trigger word for your family and friends–and perhaps for yourself as well? Using “rewilding” as a search term may also limit the connections and skills you are finding in your area…there are people all over the place that are interested in nature connection, basketry, wild edibles, urban foraging, bird watching, bird language, naturalist studies, going on nature walks, weaving, wood carving, nature crafts, campsite camping, kayaking, fishing, etc. Perhaps you might find the kind of connections you are looking for if you widen your focus a little? Yet still be working towards the greater “rewilding” vision or goal that attracted you in the first place?
I’m enjoying this thread and glad to see this topic discussed! Diversity is very much needed. I’d say let’s just see what role people of varying bodies, minds, and experiences play in rewilding. Some of us might be surprised. It’s not like any of us really know what the hell we’re doing. 
Personally I’m not interested in rewilding as a survival strategy. In fact a lot of survivalist types seem to lean more in the direction of survival-of-the-fittest/supremacist/extreme-bro-dude/insane—no thanks, I’d rather die in the city, thank you. If catastrophe kills me, that’s the way it goes. I’m interested in rewilding because I want to live a sane/healthy/connected/dignified/animistic/etc. life with reciprocity and loving f$&%ing kindness at the center, not because I want to survive an apocalypse that kills everyone else. “I shall go down with my family and the community I belong to.” You said it best, James.
James, I see you apologizing a lot on this forum. I wasn’t part of those early conversations you’re apologizing for, but I suspect all is well. You seem pretty awesome to me and clearly offer a unique and much-needed perspective around here. Thank you for being who you are! I’m glad you’re here telling your story. So much good stuff in those stories you tell.
Mona_Rose and mindyfitch,
I am working at a convention and will reply to you on Monday. The apologies result from some conversations where I made some mistakes and behaved inappropriately, but I have now recovered from. I have a reply to share, but I need to wait until Monday. Thanks.
I tried to reply on this earlier, but was unable to because of a series of computer errors.
The truth is, what causes me pain on this forum is that due to my autism, I fail to understand, many of the beliefs that many of the “rewilders” have on this forum. They have puzzled me, and my autism makes it difficult for me to make much sense of them. In addition, the more I read outside of this forum, the more I see just how diverse human beings truly are in their opinions on the world. I see so much of here closing off my ability to understand the perspectives of others.
Monarose, you mentioned the importance of broadening one’s horizons, and you were right. I have done that, and I have seen that so many “adamant” claims on this forum are not universally believes. Not everyone in the rewilding community is as adamant about civilization’s inherent unsustainably as people are on here, yet they are working just as hard to rewild as people here. I also have seen people banned off this forum whom I have gotten along with, and that has disturbed me.
One other thing that was discussed many years ago, when I was an adolescent, on this forum, was the acknowledgment that 6+ billion (now 7+ billion) people cannot be sustainably supported by any means. That helped me conclude it was in my best interest to die with civilization, but with the knowledge that others could survive in ways I never could. “Rewilding” has become a trigger word for me, and I realize that I have to shelter myself from some things in order to function in life.
When I wrote this post several days ago, I wrote that I was going to leave this forum. One day of thinking has helped me realize–the problem that is occurring is that my mind needs to find a way to understand what it perceives to be contradictory on this forum. I have ran from this for many years and it drives me crazy. Therefore, I have decided that it is important that I remain on the website until my questions are answered, and I can do so in a more peaceful format. I have left the Facebook group temporarily as I engage in this process, but I still want to stay here and LEARN. Not RUN from what puzzles me, but LEARN more about what is puzzling me.
Hey James, that makes me very happy! The other day I read your plans to leave and felt sad because I always enjoy your thoughtful posts and sometimes they intrigue me because they show me a different way of perceiving the world. So yes, please continue asking those questions!
Thank you, Anneke. Thanks very much.
I could add still that pursuing a tribal community, which should only be such that would work, is just viable in a meaningful way with it being voluntary. It is important that it should be seen by many more why this is important, any who do see why should see it is important for them to pursue coming to such a change, but still it must be for them to choose that. And how can any choose it, if they don’t see that any tribal community or any that might form such would accommodate them in what is needed for it?
Surprised that Into the Wild movie wasnt mentioned on here, there were a few copy cat deaths after that movie because being able is (probably) a temporary state.
The RE in rewilding does acknowledge a need for wilderness skill building and this site is a good example of the common call for community.
(Even TV shows that emulate survival dont typically send people out alone)
What is actually really sustainable is what has the basis for pursuit, that should apply to any that might learn of it. Going out alone for what is seen as a needed change from how one lived in civilization, even knowing all the skills for that, as if one individual alone will have that, is not such sustainable choice that is needed, it leads to no others changing in any such way, and this pursuit perishes with that individual whenever that would happen. What is the very most sustainable way still needs to be searched out, it is more than what one individual assumes. A group forming a community is needed for it, living agreeably at that sustainable level, and being visible to others, that more can be born to this stable community, and more come to it with finding it, in one way or another. And if such sustainable community with this stability provides the accommodation of those in it according to their real needs, more are enabled for it and will come to that needed change, as civilization will not come to such change and continue in stability.
Yes, it must be important to them to make such a change. But no one in my community does see its importance. In addition, I see periodically the “population” issue mentioned. I’ve said this before, but this has led me to conclude that if the world can’t support rewilded, “tribal” people at the current population, then some people should be willing to die in civilization’s collapse who are knowledgable about rewilding and civilization’s issues so that rewilders can live. If I can’t succeed in rewilding, I can at least die in the collapse knowing I’ve freed space on the Earth so a rewilder can live and thrive.
I have also concluded that any tribal community that forms develops values, and you often have to play along with those values when you depend on that community to survive.
I’m part of the “autism community” in the U.S. It’s been described as the “autism tribe.” Yet it worships civilization. To speak against civilization is blasphemy in the “autism tribe.” Yet I have autism, and the “autism tribe” that I belong to consists of my friends, my social life, and a large circle of friends that I rely on for my survival as a nomadic, traveling autism advocate around the country.
I also am very financially dependent on my parents, who worship civilization as well. My father is a devout scientific atheist who opposes all religion and anything related to anarcho-primitivism. My mother opposes anarcho-primitivism as well. Yet they are still my parents, and my Family.
In a tribal setting, if you went against the beliefs of your tribe, your survival would be threatened. People can challenge each other freely in the confines of the Internet, but if you asserted the unsustainability of civilization in a civilization-worshipping community and you depended on them for survival, you’d have to change your beliefs or you’d be thrown o
But it works both ways. I couldn’t just assert the values of civilization here, in the “rewilding tribe’s” website either, without risking my ability to stay in this community as well. That’s part of tribal life–is realizing that you have to play along with values you don’t agree with, when you rely on people for your survival needs, as all humans do within their “tribes.”